Bogadi turned into a money-spinning scheme
Chippa Legodimo | Friday March 6, 2015 12:53
The servant was sent by Abraham to find a wife for his son Isaac and after identifying Rebekah, gave her the beautiful gold bracelets and nose rings.
According to this bible scripture, Rebekah’s brother Laban ran to the spring as soon as he had seen the nose ring, and the bracelets on his sister’s arms. He then invited the servant to his father’s yard where a house had been prepared him.
“Come, you who are blessed by the Lord,” he said. “Why are you standing out here? I have prepared the house and a place for the camels.”
This scripture is relevant to the debate surrounding the issue of Bogadi and how it has turned into a business. It also throws into the mix the argument of whether in Setswana there is such a thing as bride price and if it has now turned into a prize.
A man’s relatives give to the in-laws what was never intended to symbolise any payment at least according to the bible.
It seems the original Tswana cultural practice of bogadi derived a lot from what this scripture says. However, with development and modernisation always come new trends. Some good, some bad. Besides, culture is dynamic and changes with time.
There was a hot debate on Duma fm about the purpose of bogadi in the marriage institution. Based on the varying views of callers it is clear that bogadi is one of the exploited traditional practices.
In fact, it is confusing as most people grew up under the impression that it was a practice of ‘paying’ for a wife, which varied from tribe to tribe.
Following the debate on Duma fm, former Bakwena regent Kgosi Kgosikwena Sebele has expressed his displeasure at the way bogadi has been turned into some money-spinning mechanism.
“For starters let’s understand how the word bogadi came into existence. Bogadi gabo nyale mosadi. Ke Setswana eseng Sekwena, Selete, Sengwato kana Sekalaka. We seem to confuse bogadi for bride price, but these two are not the same,” Kgosikwena told Arts & Culture.
He explained that when the man’s family meets the bride’s (Bagwegadi) for negotiations there comes a stage when they offer water (sego sa metsi) and would be told, “metsi ke a lo anwe ka pula mme lo re gadime (here is your water but please remember us) and this is where the word bogadi came from, according to Kgosikwena. The process is called peo letlhokwa.
At that stage Kgosikwena noted that the bride’s family would then rush out to bring whatever they would have brought as presents.
“These were just gifts not payment, which is why if it was cattle families would give what they could afford and of coarse wealthy families would bring more. But it was never meant to pay for anything.
“The man’s family during the same negotiations would then request for a house for their son, which would be granted because the expectation is that the newly weds should bear children, hence the reminder for the groom’s family not to forget what they would have left behind,” he said.
He explained that the idea of a bride price came with the missionary churches like the London Missionary Society. He gave the example of Kgosi Sechele I of Bakwena who subscribed to the idea of bride price after turning to Christianity.
Kgosikwena decried the fact that bogadi was turned into business by some greedy families who often charged unreasonable amounts.
“Bangwato were the last tribe to hold onto the Tswana culture of not paying anything, but they have since joined the gravy train. It is quite unfortunate that all this is done under the pretext of cultural practice,” he said.
The problem has reached alarming proportions with some families charging as high as P80,000. Some families even go to the extent of charging according to their daughter’s education and social stand meaning the better educated the bride the higher the price. These incidents have allegedly separated couples on the brink of holy communion where the prospective husband either feels the charges are unreasonable or cannot genuinely afford the high price.
“In the past even poor people could marry, but it is difficult these days. The same problem is resulting in people divorcing early into their marriages because they would have an unnecessary financial burden from bogadi. But we also see a trend of wise women who would opt to go straight to the district commissioner if the parents are making it difficult for them,” he said.
Kgosikwena said it was necessary for Parliament to draft legislation to address the problem.
“In Sweden there is no such thing as bride price, but they are a developed country. Why can’t we go back to our roots where people marry for love and not make any profit,” he said.