Turbo-Charge Your Relationships

The Winners Code
GEORGE CHINGARANDE | Monday December 15, 2008 00:00

Relationships vary from mere superficial acquintances to deep and even intimate relationships.

All relationships, regardless of their nature and the purpose they serve, need two things. Firstly, they need to be maintained. Relationships are like iron; without regular maintenance they rust.

They are also like a garden; if not properly tended the weeds will take over. Relationships also need to be turbo charged in ordwer to take them to the next level. Unless a relationship is taken to the next level familiarity will set in. Familiarity will breed boredom and contempt, and inevitably decline will begin.
In this issue we will take a closer look at some simple things that can be done to turbo charge all forms of relationships.

* Treat People Right
Human beings are very vulnerable. One of the greatest untold human needs, is the need to be touched by other people. Touched, not just superficially but emotionally as well. There are few things that touch people emotionally as the way they are treated by other people.

The statute, ' treat other people as you would like them to treat you' has been widely preached. However, inorder to make a lasting impression you need to go beyond just that.

Treat people right, no matter how they treat you in return. Treat people right, even if you suspect that they will not return the favour or worse still that they will pay you back with evil. Treat people right, even if they treated you badly in the past.

Always understand that most people rub people the wrong way simply because they have never been really treated well. They do not know the honourable way as a result they live dishonourably leaving a trail of heartbroken and disaffected people behind them.

Therefore treat all people, not as you would like them to treat you but better than you would like to be treated. Treat people, not as you think they deserve to be treated, but better than they deserve.

Nothing is more humbling and more touching than to be accorded more respect and honour and gratuitous treatment then you deserve.
We all know of people that do not deserve to be treated kindly, but the right thing to do is to give them better than they deserve. Tit for tat, and revenge is the pastime of small minded people.

* Always Make People Feel Great
Most people will quickly forget what you said, but few will ever forget how you made them feel. Always strive to make people feel great. Even better, strive to lift up other people to a place of greatness.

No one wants to remain where they are, more so if their state of affairs or condition of being is wretched.People will always long for people that make them feel respected and honored. People throng to people that lift them up, and lighten their burdens. People love people that believe in them, and give them hope for the future.

If you have nothing to give, at least give words of hope. Do not pull down people or even talk down their chances of making it in life. They are more than enough people in the business of pulling down other people.

Differentiate yourself by lifting up people, especially the weak and the surbordinate because they look upto you. Complimets are a thousand times more powerful than cricism, just as a heartfelt thank you is more powerful than a demand. In these turbulent times, the person who knows how to lift the doom and gloom from people's hearts will always do more business.

* Be Selfless Rather Than Selfish
Always put yourself third. Put God first, regardless of who you conceive him to be, and put other people second. Seek to serve and not to be served first. Seek to do other people favors first before you seek favours from them.

Your value in a relationship will always increase in people's eyes in proportion to the value of the service you offer, and your profits in business will increase in tandem with your service.

The leech and the parasite always cry, 'Give me. Give me.' That is why everyone tries to eradicate them. Always remember that the people that shout for service, jump queus and strive for attention are actually crying out for psychological help.

People with solid self esteems never shout and fulminate for attention and service.
We all want to be understood, and to be heard. However, to turbo charge your relationship seek first to understand other people and their needs and meet these needs first before yours are met. Endeavor to listen and to hear others before you seek to push through your own views.

Do not judge a good day by what the other people in the relationship have done for you, but by what you have done for them.

Do not judge a good meeting by the fact that your views have been listened to and taken on board, but by the fact that you have heard other people's views and given them due consideration.

Do not approach a relationship with the mentality that says, 'What is in it for me?', but rather with one that says 'What shall I contribute to strenghten and deepen this relationship?'

Count yourself blessed not because of how much you have received but because of how much you have given without expecting a return.
Small people seek their own good, but great people seek the good of everyone in the relationship.

Do not seek to win arguments, because arguments are relationship breakers. Always strive to win agreements, because agreements are deal makers. The people that always win arguments can not keep relationships.

Follow through on all your promises and your commitements, even those that are costly to fulfill. It tells people that you respect them and that the relationship means much to you. Make this a way of life, and greatness shall be yours.
winningmantra@yahoo.com