Author

Thulaganyo Jankie
  • Arm In: Vaccine Line And Characters

    I love my president. I also love nurses. Well, the latter not in any way with PG tags but just because their effort will elongate my life somewhat. My age range is the most diverse group of vaccine recipients and as we are queued the chit chatter has...

  • Arm In: Vaccine Line And Characters

    I love my president. I also love nurses. Well, the latter not in any way with PG tags but just because their effort will elongate my life somewhat. My age range is the most diverse group of vaccine recipients and as we are queued the chit chatter has...

  • Arm Impatient: Zero Jab Brigade

    They have been selected to onboard the first class carriage of the COVID-19 vaccine train. The selection was based on an exhaustive screening process consisting of being elderly or operating the artillery to fight COVID-19 or being Chinese. As most...

  • Happy Belated Teachers Day You Nobles

    Everyone wants you to believe you contributed greatly to their lives even those deep in Criminalland. People in wanted posters at the post office will be ringing out the plaudits like, ‘I am what I am because of you my teacher’. You almost feel...

  • Tariffs, Tariffs And More Tariffs

    Lately there has been a spike in all sorts of tariffs. Water tariffs have gone up. The Covid messages have laid on thick the advantages of proper hygiene. Just as we were getting in stride to help thwart the potency of Covid by frequently washing our...

  • Tariffs, Tariffs And More Tariffs

    Lately there has been a spike in all sorts of tariffs. Water tariffs have gone up. The Covid messages have laid on thick the advantages of proper hygiene. Just as we were getting in stride to help thwart the potency of Covid by frequently washing our...

  • Ever Had A Parent Who Is A Serial Hoarder

    The old dusty sofa set which looked like a buffalo with a horrible skin disease had now quickly morphed into some sort of masterpiece and a crowd of hoodwinked hoarders were furiously trying to outbid each other for it. Amongst the lot was my dad,...

  • Funeral Characters And Issues

    By technology I don’t mean things like playing a transistor radio. Technology nowadays is much more sinister than that. For instance it is not entirely farfetched for someone to whisper and ask you something like ‘What is the hashtag for this...

  • Isaac Makwala: Not For Children

    This was not the speaker who routinely puts ministers in their place for various infractions like calling a point of order when there’s no point of order, calling a point of procedure when there is no point of procedure or even calling them to...

  • Funeral Characters And Issues

    Technology nowadays is much more sinister than that. For instance it is not entirely farfetched for someone to whisper and ask you something like ‘What is the hashtag for this funeral?’ We are currently waddling through the fourth industrial...

  • Yippee! We Finally Made A Top 10 List

    The script is: someone like VP will hear the news. He will then let the President know and the Minister of Finance will be called. He will then tell them there’s no money for Top 10 roadshows. He will be subtly arm-twisted into doing an abracadabra...

  • Pilgrimages To Nowhere – We Are Not Going To Heaven

    But the truth is, as long as the vaccines are procured at a pace that makes continental drift look like Formula One racing the printers at the Gazette offices will keep whirring away endlessly. The following is the kind of activity that obtains...

  • Fix Those Streetlights, Nnnnnnow!

    If you vote for me I will ensure that streetlights are up and running’. This seems sensible enough until you realise you have had your fair share of representatives in the hallowed house and your town keeps getting darker and darker as the years...

  • Alcohol Is Back And Don't You Forget It

    Some news is... There was a huge sense of anticipation when it was announced the President would address the nation on Friday. With the calls of unbanning the sale of alcohol having reached a crescendo, there was an air of anticipation that The...

  • An Encounter With A Street Barber

    We all nurse that secret ambition. My bank balance has, however, kept me and my head under makeshift shades and on plastic chairs. I only go to CBD to argue with BURS staff about miscalculation on my tax returns. For a good number of us the Street...

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